


Isn't it Lovely?

by L_Leonhardt



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Era, Canon Universe, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cute Eren Yeager, Eren Yeager is a Great Actor, Fluff, Illiterate Eren Yeager, Levi is Bad At Feelings (Shingeki no Kyojin), Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Night Terrors, Nightmares, One Shot, Platonic Relationships, Platonic Romance, Protective Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Reading Together, Romance, Sleeping Together, Sleepy Cuddles, Tsundere Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), but not really, could be seen as romantic I guess, i guess, like seriously give him an Oscar, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:34:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27590761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/L_Leonhardt/pseuds/L_Leonhardt
Summary: The military believes Levi is getting too attached to Eren. To save him from the clutches of the MPs, Levi has to take advantage of a rumor that has been circulating about the boy.But now, he'll have to face a bigger problem: Eren's grievance against him.
Relationships: Levi & Eren Yeager, Levi/Eren Yeager
Comments: 13
Kudos: 207





	Isn't it Lovely?

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fic I have written months ago, finally today I have decided to publish it. It has an illustration I did for it at the end, I hope you will like it <3  
> This one shot also has a little cameo of my other fic, "The Song he Sang at Dawn", if you've read it, you'll know what I'm talking about ;)

It all started one morning, when Levi got summoned by the head of the military, Darius Zackly. It was just an informal meeting, in the latter’s office. The man wanted to discuss a matter with the Corporal, before it became of public domain.

“The Survey Corp’s custody of Eren Jäger is being called into question.”

As Levi processed that information, his core was like a volcano. Erupting lava, the red magma burned his insides, flew in his veins, burning every muscle and tissue. On the outside however, the lava cooled, leaving only black and hardened rock, concealing the chaos that was going on inside of him.

“And why is that?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

“People have been whispering in the headquarters corridors, Corporal. They’re saying you’re gone soft, that you’ve grown too attached to the boy.”

“Bullshit. I only give a crap about that brat because we need him.”

“Well, people have been saying you and Eren Jäger are spending a lot of time together.”

“Yeah, and? I’m supposed to watch over him.”

“Of course. However, is it necessary for the two of you to be alone for you to do that?”

Levi didn’t respond. He just looked at the old man with a canine expression, demanding further explanations.

“Word on the street is that you and Jäger spent an average of two to three hours alone together, sometimes no one is even aware of your whereabouts.”

Affronted, Levi gritted his teeth, doing his best to keep himself collected.

“Are you insinuating I’ve been fucking the brat behind the scenes?”

“Not at all,” Zackly said to calm him down, but Levi knew it was exactly what the old bastard was thinking. “I just want to understand what’s the purpose of you two being alone.”

There was only one way out of that mess. One Eren wasn’t going to like, good thing he wasn’t there with Levi in that moment. There was a rumor in the military concerning the boy, one that made Levi raise an eyebrow, wondering on where the hell it even came from. It was such an absurdity, it would’ve made Levi laugh, since he had seen in several occasions that the rumor in question was nothing but silly nonsense. But even if he hadn’t seen it with his own eyes, believing such a rumor was absolutely pathetic. Eren’s friends knew about the rumor, they also perfectly knew it wasn’t true, but they still loved to tease Eren about it, especially Jean.

He hated to think of how much he was going to upset Eren, but Levi knew he could use that rumor to their advantage.

“I’m teaching him how to read.”

*

The hardest part wasn’t even done. Now he had to tell Eren about all of this. After Zackly had stopped laughing, he informed Levi they were going to send them an inspector form the Military Police, to make sure what he had told him corresponded to the truth, and that he didn’t have a soft spot for Eren like the rumors said.

Now, he needed to fill Eren in and get him to play along. Which he was sure the boy was going to comply to, not without however voicing his irritation first.

He had asked Eren to follow him to his office, and the young cadet had obeyed without a thought. He was now walking behind him quietly, completely unassuming, doing his duty of following his superiors’ orders like always. Levi could tell from his eyes that part of him was wondering if he had done something wrong, but it couldn’t be more far from the truth. If anything, the only one to blame for the situation was Levi himself.

“Sit, Eren.” He told the lad once they had made it in his office, gesturing to the seat in front of his desk. Levi took his own place behind the desk, wondering how he was going to tell him everything that had happened and what they needed to do about it.

Where was he supposed to start?

“Apparently, some fucking asshole spread a rumor in the military regarding me.”

“Regarding you?”

“They think I’ve gone soft.”

Eren wasn’t sure he was following. He blinked his eyes in confusion a couple of times, before asking for clarifications, “Gone soft? What does it have to do with anything?”

Levi rubbed his temples. This kid… did he really need to have everything spelled out for him?

“They think I won’t be able to kill you if you lose control.”

Eren went silent for a few instants. Then, cautiously, he suggested, “Do you think they know? About…?”

“They know we’ve been spending time alone together. Those pigs do have suspects, but I don’t think they know for sure. At least I fucking hope they don’t.”

The brunet looked genuinely worried. Unlike Levi, who had lost that innocence many years prior, Eren was still able to wear his heart on his sleeve. It didn’t mean Levi wasn’t worried, his skin outside was just too galvanized to show it.

“Listen, I have an idea on how to fix this. But you’ll have to help me and do your part as well.”

“Yes, sir.”

“They’re gonna send us an inspector.”

Eren was listening closely.

“I’ll have to be rude and callous to you.”

Eren couldn’t refrain a small, stifled chuckle, “You mean more than usual?”

His words hurt Levi more than the boy would ever know. Levi was very self-aware, he knew he was cold and grass, and that seen from the outside, he seemed aloof and unapproachable. As much as he didn’t like it, it was hard for him to change who he was at that stage in his life.

“There’s one more thing. I know you’re gonna get your rage on, but try not to make everybody hear, okay?”

“What…? What could you possibly say to make me that mad?”

“This is where your mad acting skills will come into play so listen closely, okay?”

“Yes sir.”

“I told them that you can’t read and I’m teaching you how to.”

He did it. He had lighted the fuse. Now he just needed to wait for the bomb to explode. Eren was staring straight at him, one eyebrow raised, his mouth half opened and one corner of it curled into a snarl. He shot up from his seat, slamming both his fists on the table.

“You told them WHAT!”

“There we go…”

“Yes, of course we’re going there! HOW could you say something like that, Corporal?!”

Levi too got up from his seat, to stare at him at eye level. Even though it did little to help.

“Did you prefer getting sent to the MPs to be dissected?”

Eren huffed, “Hanji already does that anyway!”

He had a point. Hanji didn’t really go as far as dissecting him alive, but at times, the experiments they put him through were inhumane.

“What was I supposed to do?! It was the only believable excuse I could come up with!”

If he had set off a bomb before, now he had set off the whole stock of dynamite.

“The only BELIEVABLE?! Oh yes, because there’s nothing more believable than me being a stupid kid who’s fifteen and still hasn’t learned how to read, right?!”

“I don’t believe it Eren but they did! What else could I have said?!”

“You could’ve said you were giving me lessons on how to get better at 3dmg! Or that we were studying military plans, literally anything else!”

Levi thought it was a good idea right in that moment. It was a widely spread rumor among the military, especially those higher ups who didn’t think too highly of Eren and liked to slander him for fun. It didn’t matter how absurd that rumor was, they hated him so much that they would believe anything.

And Eren was right. There were just so many other options he could have said, and they would’ve been believable as well. Just not as gladly received by those bastards as the lie Levi came up with.

“I… just didn’t think about it.”

A few instants of endless, insufferable silence passed. Levi almost missed Eren’s angry shouting at him. Now the boy was just standing still, with his fists clenched and a forlorn look in his eyes.

“Now not only everyone thinks I’m a monster, I’m also the laughingstock of the entire military,” He murmured with a gravelly voice, before doing the military salute. “With your permission, sir.”

He turned on his feet and left, showing Levi his back before he could even think about what to reply. After he had watched Eren walk away, the short man let his weight fall dead on his chair, bringing a hand to his forehead.

He had messed up big time.

*

Perhaps, they were right when they said Levi had a soft spot for Eren. The way he had spoken to him in his office earlier, the way he had yelled at his own superior would’ve gotten any other cadet a harsh punishment. Or at least, a beating from the Corporal on the spot. Levi couldn’t bring himself to do the same to Eren. They boy was already worn out by all the titan experiments Hanji was making him endure, he didn’t need more punishment. Even having to listen to Hanji’s unsufferable rambles was punishment enough.

And even without all that, Levi wouldn’t have reprimanded Eren. He had all the reasons to be upset. Levi had turned him into a joke, fueling those gossips he should’ve taken down instead. He was his mentor, he was supposed to look out for him. His lie potentially saved the lad’s life, but what about his reputation? About his mental wellbeing? All because he wasn’t creative enough to invent another excuse.

Levi looked inside the oven. If the smell wasn’t enough to tell the cookies were ready, that delicious golden color they had turned into did. Very careful not to burn himself, he took the tray out of the oven and laid it on the table. The smell of freshly baked cookies didn’t take long to lure someone in.

“Oooh cookies!” Hanji, who seemed to have appeared from thin air, reached for the cookies but Levi slapped their hand away.

“Don’t touch! These are for Eren.”

“For Eren? Interesting.” They said, holding their hand, but not even offended by Levi’s gesture.

“What do you mean by that, shitty glasses?”

“I guess you’re atoning with cookies, aren’t you?”

“Huh?”

“What’s this story that you’re teaching Eren how to read? Why would you feed those gossips like that? You know they aren’t true. We’ve both seen him read and write.”

“I had no choice, okay?” 

After Levi had told them the whole story, Hanji could barely contain themself from laughing out loud.

“You seriously couldn’t come up with anything else? Geez, you’re so bad at lying. You and Mikasa are very similar in that. Just, don’t tell her I told you this.”

They said, before snapping a cookie and running off.

“HANJI!”

His yelling only made them laugh, for having been able to run away from the grumpy dwarf with at least one cookie.

*

Levi put the cookies in a cotton bag and exited the kitchen. He didn’t walk much in the corridor before he found Eren coming out one of the rooms. He had some battle plans in his hands so someone probably sent him to get them.

He was grateful to anyone who gave him that order, since giving him the cookies now meant he could eat them while they were still warm.

“Oi, Eren.”

The brunet turned around, hardly containing himself from rolling his eyes and huffing when he heard the man’s voice.

“Yes, Captain?” Eren was annoyed beyond measure, but he still answered and saluted respectfully.

“At ease, soldier.” the Captain pushed something in his free hand, “Take this.”

Before the young soldier even opened the bag, the delicious smell of vanilla and chocolate already told it all, “Are these… cookies? What am I supposed to do with them?”

Levi crossed his arms, his face not betraying any emotion, “They’re for you, idiot.”

For a few instants, Eren just stared at him, flabbergasted. Levi could’ve sworn a corner of the boy’s mouth almost curled into a smile, but Eren was good at controlling himself.

“You baked me cookies?” He asked, stupefied. Was that a blush he was seeing on Eren’s cheeks? As much self-control as he had, the lad certainly couldn’t refrain his cheeks from heating up.

“Perhaps they can sweeten that sour and shitty mood of yours.”

He said, before turning on his heels and leaving. Before he gave him his back, Eren distinctively saw Levi’s cheeks painted of a soft pink color. The boy didn’t even have the time to process any of that before the Captain left, he didn’t even get the chance of thanking him.

His lips curled into a smile, as he stared at the bag of warm, sweet smelling cookies in his hand.

*

Not many days passed that the military send an inspector to the Castle. It was cleaning day, and it was the perfect opportunity for Levi and, the unwilling, Eren to enact his plan. 

“I want those windows spotless, and repeat your alphabet while you’re at it, shitty brat.”

Eren sighed. “Yes, sir. A, B, C, D, E…”

“Alphabet?” The inspector asked, puzzled. Clearly, his superiors hadn’t told him all the details. Just that he needed to supervise the two of them, to make sure he didn’t grow as attached to the boy as they believed.

“Can you believe this shitty brat was illiterate? I need to teach him everything. There isn’t a single thing this useless kid can do right, not cleaning, not reading, not turning into a titan when he has too...”

Levi went off, knowing the crueler he was, the most believable he was going to seem. He just had to be himself, just amplified. Not that he liked insulting Eren like that, but he had done worse things to the boy. And even if it were to keep him safe, the guilt remained. It was something he was willing to live with.

“Don’t you think you’re being a bit too harsh with the boy?” The inspector questioned him, a single drop of sweat cascading down his temple. Levi scoffed at that. Did he really want to make him believe he cared how Eren was treated? He knew what game the MPs were playing. And he was going to reiterate.

“He’s not a boy, he’s a weapon. A dangerous one at that.”

There was a small pause in Eren’s recital of the alphabet. He resumed shortly after, but the intonation in his voice was different.

He sounded disheartened.

The change was hardly noticeable, but Levi did.

He did and his heart fell.

Did he actually think Levi believed all those things he was saying? Didn’t he know it was all part of the rouse?

*

Later that day, it was time for a tea break for everyone. Eren and Levi were sitting alone on one of the tables outside. The inspector was sitting at one of the tables not much far away from theirs. The two had their pencils and a notebook, where Levi was pretending to teach Eren how to write. The lad was hunched on the notebook with a forlorn, hopeless look on his face. He felt so humiliated, and Levi hated doing it to him.

“Now write this sentence five times.” Levi said, loud enough for the instructor to hear him.

“Don’t write too fast or he will start suspecting.” He susurrated to Eren. The brunet did as he was told, slowing his writing pace.

“Ereeeeen!”

Levi rolled his eyes. Leave it to Hanji to interrupt their perfectly acted scene. Eren on the other hand, sighed in relief. He would’ve gladly taken any titan experiment over the mortification of having to pretend to be illiterate.

“I brought you a gift!” They exclaimed, all giddy, while handing him an object they were sure it was going to be of Eren, and Levi’s, interest.

“A book?” Eren took it from their hands, studying the cover with curiosity. The tome was of a deep blue color, the title was in silver lettering, and so were the decorations around it.

“Yes, so you can practice!” They said, winking at him. Apparently, they wanted to help out with their farse too.

“He’s not ready to read a full book yet, Hanji.” Levi said, keeping up with the act since the inspector was looking at them with interest.

“It has your name in the title!” Hanji completely ignored Levi, keeping the focus on the young soldier sitting beside the grumpy old man.

“It says Eren here?” The brunet pretended to be surprised, but he perfectly knew the title of the book read _Efren the Fair Knight_. Not really his name, but quite similar.

“Well, if you take out the ‘F’ here, it does!” The mad scientist said, covering the letter with their fingers.

Eren started skimming through the pages, with a genuine interest, “Whoa, it has pictures like Armin’s books.”

“Of course it does! All illustrations from the original author.”

“Holy shit…!” Eren’s face reddened when he comes across the illustration of two men lying in bed together. He closed the book as soon as he could, but the Captain had already given a peek.

Levi casted Hanji a dirty look. In exchange, the mad scientist just chuckled.

“You gave him _that_ book.”

“Yes, I did.”

Maliciousness was painted everywhere on their face. What did they think? That a novel about two male lovers could be some sort of sexual education for Eren? They were beyond stupid. And clearly, they hadn’t thought it through when they picked that one book. Levi had read it years prior, and remembered every part of the story perfectly. Did Hanji forget how that story started, or were they just insensitive?

“Eren, give it here a minute.”

“Y-yes Sir.” As soon as Eren handed him the book, Levi started ripping off the first few pages while Hanji was frozen in horror and Eren just stared in confusion. The man then handed the book back to Eren, as if he didn’t just vandalize it. 

“First chapter was unnecessary.” It was the only explanation the Captain was willing to offer.

“You could’ve just told him to skip it!” Hanji complained, while picking up the ripped pages from the ground.

Levi just uttered a “tsk”. Eren wondered what it was exactly that the Captain didn’t want him to read. He had expected him to rip the licentious illustration instead of the first chapter. What could be worse than that? Did he even want to know? He trusted Levi’s judgement, so the answer he gave himself was no. 

Instead of thinking about it, he opened the book and started reading the summary on the first page. In his mind of course, since he couldn’t let the instructor find out he could read and let his and Levi’s work be in vain.

_When Efren Montenegro entered the secret organization_

_set on the destruction of the King, he did it with only one goal in mind:_

_revenge for his mother and his homeland._

_The last thing he had expected, was to fall in love_.

“Could you read me the summary, Captain Levi?” Eren said.

“Try to do it on your own.”

“Ugh, fine.”

If he hadn’t known any better, he would’ve thought that irritation was genuine. Levi never stopped being amazed by that wonder boy, he had gotten into the part perfectly. He knew Eren could act, but damn was he good.

After a few minutes pretending to struggle with his reading, Eren spoke again, “It actually sounds interesting. I wonder if this Knight will actually manage to get his revenge…”

Levi spoke low enough for only Eren to hear, “We can read it tonight at the place, if you want.”

That caught Eren by surprise, “Oh, okay.”

“Finish your homework now.”

“Yes sir!” He obeyed enthusiastically, grabbing his pencil like he had been a sword. For the first time that day, Levi finally saw a smile on Eren’s face.

*

 _The place_ was a secluded little hut near a river. Once used by travelers and nomadic merchants, it was soon abandoned after many cheap hostels started opening in town. Levi had found it one day, shortly after joining the survey corps. After Farlan and Isabel’s death, he was wandering aimlessly through the woods for a place he could grieve in peace, when he found it. After crying all his tears there in the dirt, he came again a few days later with brooms, buckets, and other cleaning supplies. 

From that day forward, it became the Captain’s secret place. It was a little piece of paradise he used to run off to, when he needed a break from the world, usually to read his books in peace. 

Until he decided to share it with Eren, one night when the boy was assaulted by night terrors. The Captain had snuck him out of the dungeon and brought him to his most secret place, hoping the night animals and the sound of the water would calm him down and help him sleep.

The first night he fell asleep rather quickly, lying on his side next to Levi who was reading his book. Until a few hours later, when he began quietly crying in his sleep.

Curling in a fetal position, small sobs made his entire body tremble. Levi put a hand on his shoulder and shook him a little, trying to wake him up.

“Eren.” 

No response.

“Eren.” He called a little louder, but Eren wouldn’t wake up. What was he supposed to do in these situations? His instinct told him to touch him. So, he took him and drew him close, pressing the boy’s head against his chest. Slowly, Eren’s breathing started evening out, his cries slowly subduing. 

Levi felt his face catching on fire. This situation was way too embarrassing for him. If Eren had woken up, without any doubt Levi would’ve kicked him out of the bed, before the boy could’ve realized the way his Captain was holding him, almost like a lover.

Levi didn’t like that type of physical contact. He wasn’t used to it. His mother died too early on in his life for him to remember how it felt like, to hold and be held, and to let oneself go in a warm embrace.

And yet here he was, holding a sleeping Eren tight to his chest. Levi didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. Still, he couldn’t let go.

From that day forward, it became a habit for them. They would sleep together on the bed made of yielding hay, much more comfortable than the HQ’s hard mattresses and surely more than the dungeon’s. Or to better say, Eren would sleep, while Levi would lie next to him and read his books, or watch over him, lulling away the boy’s nightmares when he had to.

No one knew about the nights they used to spend together. And no one needed to know. Their innocent, sweet encounters were not going to appear so innocent in the public’s eyes. Even less in the eyes of the military.

Levi knew what they were doing was dangerous. Eren knew too. And still, neither of them could stop. 

Eren needed to hear Levi’s heartbeat for his nightmares to stop. And Levi needed to hear Eren breathing to fall asleep. They both needed each other.

Sometimes, they would meet each other there even during the day, to read together, or to escape from the stress of the military life, even if just for a couple of hours.

*

When the sky started turning a soft shade of orange, Eren went to the hut like Captain Levi had instructed him to, carrying his new novel with him. He was delighted at the idea of reading together with the Captain again, they hadn’t done it in a while. The man never talked much, but Eren still loved it. Whether they read aloud in turn or they just followed along in silence, Eren treasured those moment he spent alone with the Captain. It was a special bonding session they had together, Eren couldn’t quite give a name to it, he just knew he wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Levi also used to be softer with him in that hut, touching him often on the back and shoulder, speaking to him in a soft voice.

When Eren entered in their secret meeting place, Levi was already sitting on the bed, with his back rested against the stony wall.

“Good evening, Captain.”

“Eren. Come sit here.”

As always when they were in that hut, there was something different about the Captain’s voice. It was warmer, more gentle. Eren went to sit on the bed next to him, opening the book on the first page.

“Do you want to read aloud today or read along?”

“My mouth’s a bit dry. We’ll read along if that’s okay with you.”

“Sure.” Eren said, leaning a bit toward Levi so they could both have a good view of the text. But the other soldier had another idea. Levi took him from under the arms and brought him on his lap.

“Huh… what are you doing, Captain?”

“It’s easier to read like this.” He said, resting his chin on Eren’s shoulder. He had a good view of the book in that position, so he could read along with Eren without getting a stiff neck. But no matter how many lies he told himself, Levi knew it wasn’t the only reason he was holding him like that.

Levi longed to remember. He wanted to feel it all again, how it was to hold and be held.

Eren didn’t think anything of it. He just started reading the book, on his Captain’s lap, like it was the most ordinary thing in the world.

The brunet wasn’t surprised they had come to this. The more time they passed alone in the hut, the more they became comfortable with touching each other tenderly. Or more precisely, Levi was the one getting more comfortable. Eren never rejected physical touch, he liked holding hands with his friends, or hugging them, or any other form of affection and casual touched. It wasn’t a big deal to Eren, but it was to Levi. And he didn’t even know how much he was helping him, with letting him feel that human warmth again.

Not even Levi himself noticed the smile he had on his face, when he saw Eren’s face full of marvel as he started reading the tale.

*

Another day passed, another day of Levi being more rude than the necessary to Eren in front of the inspector. This time, he actually made the boy tear up. Eren tried to hide it, but Levi saw him brushing away his tears when he though no one was watching him. It made the raven haired feel like complete garbage. He wanted to apology to Eren right in that moment, but with that damned inspector on their tails, it was impossible.

The whole ordeal had made Levi so nervous, he punched the first person he met in the corridor. He didn’t even see who it was, and the poor bastard never knew what hit him. Instead of releasing his tension, the episode made him feel like an even bigger piece of garbage.

*

That night, in the secluded privacy of their little secret hut, Levi tried to make amend the best way that he could. Soft touches and small kisses on Eren’s nape, shoulders and back, as he held him from behind.

“You’re distracting me.” Eren giggled, the skin on his nape was sensitive and ticklish, and kept his attention away from his book. Levi’s response was to hold him tighter, pressing his forehead against the brunet’s shoulder.

Eren knew what he meant to say. Words didn’t come easy to him. But the brunet could hear all the _I’m sorry_ concealed in his kisses, the _forgive me_ embossed in his forehead pressed against his own shoulder, every _I love you_ drenched in his soft touches.

Levi took the book from Eren’s hands, closing it and lying it on the floor. 

“Captain?”

“It’s enough, Eren. You need to rest, tomorrow will be a long day.”

“But I really wanted to know what happens next…!”

“We’ll continue tomorrow, okay? Now sleep.”

“I’ll try to.”

If it was anyone else, Eren would’ve waited until he fell asleep and then he would’ve kept reading his book, but with Levi, he knew waiting was useless. Levi didn’t sleep. Or at least, he had never seen him sleep. The first time the raven haired had had eight straight hours of sleep in a single night, was one of those first nights they spent together in that hut. Only after Eren had fallen asleep, the boy’s breathing lulled the older man to sleep too.

He still woke up before him each morning, so Eren never knew how much he had helped him with his insomnia.

* 

Eren was sleeping peacefully, his chest raising and falling slowly, like the waves of the sea. 

_I really have gone soft, didn’t I… all because of this little shit…_

Levi laid next to him, pressing their foreheads together.

There was a question Levi seriously needed to ask himself. But he kept running from it. Running and running… even though he knew one day, the question was going to catch up with him. And sooner or later, he was going to have to give himself an answer.

*

The next night, Eren and Levi where in their secret place again, Eren could finally read how the story continued. They had gotten to the point where Efren and Leon, the two lovers, meet up in an underground dungeon to live their secret, forbidden love. Even if it was just for the nights.

“This romance crap is so boring,” Eren complained, “I wanna see Efren kill the King.”

Levi laughed quietly, “I’m not surprised.”

“Ha, ha.” Eren knew he was mocking him, because he could empathize a lot with the character from the book. They had both lost their parents, they both had thirst for revenge. The brunet couldn’t deny it, all those similarity with his own life made him really invested in the story.

Levi had read that book before him, so he knew Eren was going to see himself in the main character. That’s why he ripped off the first chapter, when Hanji had gifted him that book. It described the death of the protagonist’s mother, and he surely didn’t want it to trigger any of Eren’s most painful memories.

The brunet resumed to reading the story aloud,

_> > Why me? Why do you love me? << _

_That was just one of the many questions going through the raven haired’s mind._

_For some reason that he couldn’t explain to himself, he felt like crying._

_Strand by strand, he started brushing Efren’s hair away from his serene face._

_He felt the need to protect that marvelous creature in his arms._

_But Efren was strong enough to protect himself, he didn’t need Leon for that,_

_or anyone else for that matter. Still, the desire to protect him lingered,_

_planting roots in Leon’s heart._

Levi did not understand. What were those sensations he was feeling? He felt a pricking sensation in his eyes and nose, his throat and chest felt tighter, and he felt something warm on his cheeks. When he brough a hand to his face, he noticed his cheeks were wet.

Oh god.

Were those tears?

Without saying a single word to Eren, the Captain pushed him away from his lap, and got off the bed. A bewildered Eren watched him as he headed for the door, finding the resolution to open his mouth just as the man was about to leave.

“Captain? Where are you going?”

Levi collected himself, before answering him.

“Keep reading Eren, I need a moment alone.”

*

Levi was sitting on the grass near the river. He had washed his face with the cold water a couple of times, and while it had washed away the salt of his own tears on his skin, it couldn’t wash away what he was feeling. This tingling sensation in his throat, this suffocating hold in his chest.

It was all that stupid book’s fault. Why did that story had to be so relatable? Those words only reminded him of his situation with Eren. He was supposed to protect him, he wanted to protect him, but he also had to kill him whether he lost control. He knew he couldn’t keep protecting Eren. Sooner or later, he was going to have to say goodbye to him, just like with all the other people he had lost along the way.

“Captain Levi?” 

Of course. It was only natural the lad had followed him. He should also have known he couldn’t have left that way without making Eren worry.

“Sit here.” He said calmly, patting the spot next to him.

“Did I do something wrong?” The boy asked, as soon as he took his seat.

“No, Eren.” Levi leaned his head on the boy’s shoulder, “It’s just… life.”

Eren smiled, leaning his head on Levi’s, “I get that way too well.”

Levi could never quite understand what Eren was to him. Never. Not when he first met him, and not even when he passed away years later. Was he like the son he never had? A friend? A comrade? Or just the hope of humanity? 

Or perhaps all of that combined, and yet so much more? He wasn’t sure what kind of love bonded him to Eren, but of one thing Levi was sure; he loved him.


End file.
